my birfday

today is my birthday!



i am currently spending it alone (am i okay with this? maybe. i haven't decided. i'm trying to avoid feeling lonely...)


i'm 24. eep!


Carla isn't even here for my birthday, because unfortunately, her Grandpa died on Monday! sad sad sad!

first day joyfulness

i am usually quick to jump to conclusions about the new things in my life, i.e.:

"i love my new job"-i was fired 5 weeks later.
"getting married is the next step for sure"-well, we all know this didn't exactly pan out.
"this guy is awesome and i think i can get serious with him"-most single guys are douchebags....and it takes too long to sort them out [they should wear nametags: "Hello! I'm James, (Douchebag)"


but today i had my first day on my new nanny job and i really really enjoyed it a LOT. i don't want to make any grandiose statements like "I love it and want to do it forever..." or "It's PERFECT", but today did go really really well.

last fall when i was still married, i was a nanny for a family with a 2 1/2 year old and a 1 year old and it was SO challenging.

first of all they didn't have a very big home, so i rotated from the kitchen to the living room to the upstairs kid's room and somedays i was inside their house from 8 am to 6 pm and it made me crazy.

secondly, the dad worked from home, so he was always in the next room, which had its upsides, but definitely made me feel like i was being chaperoned on my own job.

thirdly they had a LOT of restrictions for their kids, like organic foods, no tv, closed circuit tv baby monitors (so i could actually watch the kids take naps w/o being in the room, it always made me feel creepy)......

the family that i started with today has very similar guidelines, like the fresh foods, nothing fried, no tv, but they're more relaxed about things like no baby monitors i just have to keep an ear out, no coddling (it makes the kids much more mature and accepting about things if they don't go their way, it's hard but it really helps them understand SO much more!)

and at the end of the day, when the mom came home, the baby didn't want me to leave! which was GREAT because she normally has a hard time adjusting to people! it was so precious to be missed before i'd even gone out the door!

while i am avoiding saying that i had a super-awesome-great day, i really enjoyed my first day on the new job and i am actually looking forward to waking up at an ungodly hour tomorrow to face my second day! yippy!

re-adjusting

definitely gonna have to readjust my sleeping patterns now that my work week is 7:30a-5p Monday through Thursday! AND i'm gonna have to start getting things done when i get home in the afternoon.

i'd like to work in time to read the books i'm in the middle of (still haven't finished the divorce book even though i am itching to!) and i need to DEFINITELY schedule in some work-out time (considering i had to peel my jeans off tonight, literally, peel, it made me feel disgusting).....


i'm just going to have to do a lot of readjusting, especially because it's something i've always struggled with, time management. bluh! i hate growing up.


alright.

i have to be at my new nanny job in 8 hours........must sleep............now!


(will tell more about the job in the next post, promise!)

prolonged singleness

let's review:

first boyfriend, the Outcast: dated from March 1999-May 1999 (9th grade!!!). broke up with him b/c he wanted to put his hand up my shirt and he wasn't a Christian (said i was weak because i was a Christian).

singleness: lasted from May to July, approximately 2 months.

second boyfriend, the Jock: dated from July 1999-February 2000. broke up a few days before Valentines. found out he was dating someone new one week later.

singleness: lasted from Feb 2000 to May 2000, approximately 2 months.

third boyfriend, the Heart-Throb: dated from March 2001-March 2002. but we practically dated from May 2000 to April 2002. he was my first real love, but he was too needy, and unfortunately, now he's a tool! why do the good ones go rotten?

singleness: lasted from April 2002 to June 2002, approximately 2 months.

fourth boyfriend, the OverKill Christian: dated from June 2002-September 2002. i knew he was an outspoken conservative Christian when we met, but seriously, you have never seen someone so naive to the real world. broke up with him over dinner in the cafeteria at college.

singleness: lasted from September 2002 to January 2003, approximately 4 months.

fifth boyfriend, i.e. the Unhusband: dated from 2003 to 2005, got engaged, engaged for a year, then married in June 2006. married for a year and 4 months, ended October 2007. total togetherness: 5 years almost.

singleness: lasted from October 2007 to March 2008, approximately 5 months (which was best because i was a MESS)

sixth boyfriend, the Depresso: dated from March 2008 to May 2008. i think he was definitely my "rebound" boyfriend. what was i thinking? i knew nothing about him!

currently single after that lame break-up.

do you notice the pattern that i do? i am usually only single for 2-4 months and then i'm off the market indeterminably. i recognized this pattern and shared my concern with my ever-so-fabulous roommate Carla, and we both think it might be interesting for me to be single for a while, just to see what happens.

i never really thought i was one of those women who "doesn't like to be alone", but looking at that pattern, it makes me feel like a cheesy, overly dependent wuss-woman. i'm kind of excited to see what i can come up with when left to my own devices for more than a few months.........and it's kind of nice to keep my options open for a bit. it doesn't mean i won't enjoy the men that are in my life, but i just won't be tying myself down for a while.

the unofficial game-plan 08-09

so,

i accepted a nanny position, hopefully it will work out so that i can work with this family until the end of next July.

and hopefully by the end of next July i will have gotten a NC Teacher's certification so that i can qualify for a lateral-entry teaching position.

that, my dear friends, is the unofficial gameplan.

it took a lot of thought and prayer and assessment, but i really do think that i will be happy as a nanny while i save some money and help enrich the lives of two beautiful kids, and i think that i will ultimately be happy if i am a teacher as well.

i'm also thinking i might add some online courses to try and get my Master's in Creative Writing....oh, all these dreams are just adding up!

8 things? only 8? ok!

my new friend Millie has tagged me to do a me-me of listing 8 things that i want to do before i die.


alright Millie, you asked for it. :)

8: live in a treehouse. swiss family robinson style.

7: visit Kakadu National Park in Australia, it was on NOVA 'Living Edens' on PBS when i was in 10 grade and it's been on my list ever since.

6: read the entire Bible, even the begats.

5: meet Oprah Winfrey (hopefully when she deals with my #1 list topper)

4: be asked to sing at a friend's wedding. hopefully after i've taken some serious voice lessons. *this is really 2 hopes combined into one list item.

3: join a pool league. i LOVE to play pool. i don't care if i totally don't fit in because i have all my teeth and i don't smoke, i love going to the dankest pool halls and playing pool for hours.

2: have children. i've always always always known that i am going to be the best mom ever.

1: write a bestseller and have it win awards like "Best New Author" etc. etc. :) DREAM BIG!


i'll tag who i want, but not right now......will come later....

hook me up Jesus

alright.

so.

tonight at work,

i put in,

my 2 weeks notice.

last day will be Friday the 15.


alright Jesus.

i'm ready for whatever You're lining up.


i hope it's gooooooooood!