when i went to pay my credit card bill last month i wasn't paying attention when i confirmed the payment, so when i logged back in a few days later to make sure it posted i realized i'd posted it from one of his banking accounts on accident.
i immediately realized what i had done and called him then.
but today, while i am at my $7/hr measly job:
1- i have one missed call.
2- i have one short voicemail that sounds more or less like this:
hey, it's me. i don't know if you know, but you used my account to pay for something, and i didn't have sufficient funds so it overdrew, and we need to talk.
3-as soon as i am on break, my phone is ringing, so i answer, it's him.
4-he's walking *our* sweet dog, and is a little out of breath. he says,
"You overdrew from my checking and I got fined....I hate when you do stuff like this.....etc"
5- he goes on into a mini-lecture about how he's already strapped for money and how he just can't handle me stressing him out over stuff like "this".
6-i apologize and kindly remind him that i had already warned him that what i had done would have some repurcussions, but that i had called him 2 weeks ago for a head's up. he says he has to go, but that if i could just repay him what he was fined by his bank ($12) then we'd be square. AND he reminded me like i was 12, to remove his banking account from my credit card banking links. DUH, i told him, i had already done that two weeks ago.
7-i eat lunch, alone in the break room at work, crying with no one to talk to.
8-he calls me back about 10 minutes later.
9-says he just got things straightened out with his bank and they didn't fine him afterall. he says "I took care of it".
10-i say: "from now on, whenever you're in freakout mode, how about just send me an email. i cannot handle how stupid you make me feel and i can't take that ever again."
11-i hang up feeling like i stood up for myself and helped him see himself in my mirror for once.
12-i am reminded all over again why i had to leave and why i could not be his wife for 1 second longer.
13-my heart rejoiced.
1 comment:
I relate to feeling like crap every time you talk on the phone with your ex. Just for background, I got married at 21 and divorced this summer at 24, no kids, and she got the cat :(
Anyways, requesting that he email you is a great idea. I did something similar b/c every time her name would pop up on my phone it would mess with me emotionally for the rest of the day or the entire weekend. Even if I answered and it was just some little question, being bothered by her and reminded of all that pain was too much for me. So I asked her to email me when she needed something and not to call me unless it was an emergency. She didn't like it but at least now I don't have to feel paranoid all the time that her name is going to pop up on my phone. This also prevented her from calling me with some little question just as an excuse to talk to me.
Sounds like this guy does a terrible job of respecting you on the phone, talking to you like you're a child, etc. That's the worst, when they're just trying to pick fights with you or make you feel bad by talking down to you. Well that's all for now but I appreciate your blog.
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